I Shalt Become

A Haunting Voice from the American Black Metal Underground

In the shadowy underworld of depressive Black Metal, few names resonate with as much spectral presence as I Shalt Become. Emerging from the obscurity of Illinois in the mid-1990s, this enigmatic project was conceived by the reclusive S. Holliman, who sought to channel inner torment into raw, uncompromising soundscapes. As a one-man act for many years, Holliman handled every aspect of the music, vocals, guitars, bass, and ambient keyboards, crafting works that feel less like albums and more like solitary funeral rites.

The project’s first major statement came in the form of "Wanderings", a cassette released in 1996 that has since become a cult touchstone within the underground Black Metal scene. Drenched in lo-fi murk, its hypnotic repetition, blurred textures, and distant screams captured a kind of spiritual numbness that echoed the likes of Burzum yet remained distinctly American in its bleakness. Though its production was primitive, the emotional weight was immense, there was no ideology here, no pretense of grandeur, only raw sorrow stretched across long, meandering tracks. Many listeners consider "Wanderings" one of the earliest blueprints for what would later be called DSBM (Depressive Suicidal Black Metal).

The project's second chapter, a demo titled "In the Falling Snow", recorded in 1999, was bootlegged under the title "Birkenau" before eventually seeing official release in 2008. While some assumed a political or ideological theme due to the controversial bootleg name, Holliman was clear in interviews and lyrics: there was no ideology, no belief, just pain. This rejection of external narrative in favour of deeply personal anguish became a defining feature of I Shalt Become’s artistic philosophy.

After nearly a decade of silence, I Shalt Become reemerged in 2008 with "Requiem", a somber and atmospheric album that reaffirmed Holliman’s commitment to creating deeply introspective Black Metal. With a more polished but still cavernous production, "Requiem" built upon the emotional core of earlier work while introducing subtle new textures. It was lauded by many fans as a spiritual sibling to Burzum’s "Filosofem", both in tone and in minimalistic construction.

The following years saw a rapid expansion of I Shalt Become’s musical palette. Albums such as "The Pendle Witch Trials" (2009), "Poison" (2010), and "Louisiana Voodoo" (2013) incorporated more symphonic elements, including keyboards and orchestral layering. The inclusion of drummer A. J. Scherer brought a new rhythmic dimension to the project, adding weight and urgency to the ethereal gloom. While the essence remained mournful and meditative, these later works suggested a shift from solitary despair to a broader exploration of atmosphere and folklore. Titles and themes began to evoke historical mysticism, from English witch hunts to Southern Gothic decay, yet Holliman never abandoned his obsession with desolation as the primary emotional thread.

Musically, I Shalt Become sits at the crossroads of several traditions: the icy repetition of Scandinavian Black Metal, the inward collapse of DSBM, and the ambient minimalism of darkwave. The project's sound is deliberately sparse, with long instrumental passages that evoke isolation, loss, and existential paralysis. There are no bombastic flourishes or aggressive crescendo, just a slow, steady erosion of the self. Holliman’s vocals, often buried in the mix, serve more as distant howls than lyrical conveyors, making the atmosphere the true protagonist.

Despite its low profile, I Shalt Become has had a lasting impact on American Black Metal. It helped lay the groundwork for the one-man depressive acts that would follow in the 2000s, from Xasthur to Leviathan, and its refusal to engage in the theatrics or ideologies often associated with Black Metal gave it a purity of intent that resonated with those seeking honesty in despair.

Ultimately, I Shalt Become is not music to be consumed casually, it is music to sink into. Whether through the stark suffering of Wandering or the ghostly grandeur of Poison, the project remains a solitary monolith in the landscape of atmospheric Black Metal. Holliman's vision is uncompromising, bleak, and deeply human. In a genre often obsessed with the external, myth, war, anti-religion, I Shalt Become turns inward, offering a mirror to the soul at its most fractured.